Nothing Left

cuz what you've never had is nothing left to lose
nothing left to understand
when all you've had is something better than before
all you coulda been is worse than what you are
look off and see those differences away so far
i bet the changes are too difficult for you to imagine
cuz there's nothing to forget
in the end i guess there's nothing to regret
just emptiness and laughing silence left to rot
all that coulda been is just wrong
gonna leave those gifts that coulda been given cuz they're wrong
cuz the way you coulda learnt is wrong
wrong wrong wrong
never knew any other way that what i can see today
but all i can see is the way that the old ones pray
but i don't think that is gonna be another way
that reality has never held ground for me today
angels once said that all i can do is tell the story i was told
get out of this dark hole, break the mold
take myself a blanket and go back out in the cold
somewhere in the back of my mind i know the truth was sold
to someone else who didn't have a soul
or maybe just that they didn't break the mold
cuz all they wanted was what's been sold
somethings never change and somethings never stay the same
somewhere out there there's nothing similar
that is reality everything is just a mirror
of what we wanted when it was gone in magic made
by those who wanted to make sure we wouldn't manage or remake
what the wanted us to hate
those things about ourselves we try to remake
cuz there's never time telling you that it's too late
maybe a second chance is just to turn back the clock and go out that gate
another chance to change the hands of fate
so cruel and unjust there's sometimes nothing left but hate
and no-one left to liberate
i hope there's something left for you to leave
so that i can take a chance and love
instead of hoping to take some paint and cover it all uo
instead of making it vanish up

Round Drum

round drum
carries heartbeat, heartbreak
carry that drum in your chest
take good care to protect and honour
your ancestors worked for it
take good care of it
only love and honesty are in there
there is a reason you have been givent this drum,
this drum that was carried by those who are near and dear,
at least those you are descended from, whether there is love there or not
take this drum from them
even if you do not love them, because without it you will be lost
there will be nothing to carry your heartbeat, heartbreak
take this drum
and with it you will be able to hear your heart
take this heart, and you will be able to hear the heartbeats of your ancestors
those echoes are still in there
take this heart, and you will be able to hear what has happened before you
those stories are still in there
gently take this drum so you can hear your drumbeat
they say that individuals only march to the beat of their own drum
only you can decide what that beat is
take this heart so you can hear your drumbeat
take this drum

Anyways

cut the surface like glass
metal gunwhale sharpened to a point
we're going home
horizon invisible to the naked eye
donning sunglasses at night, i see home
sparkling stars dancing in the dark sky
up above my head
heart's compass is the only necessary guide
day's just begun
no-where
some-where
any-where
nothing between us and the other side
admiring the beautific trees and green
ripples hit the rocks
all i know of them is their reverbations
echoes coming back to me
everything i need
everything i need
everything i need
it's all here with me
somewhere south behind is a land of glass and cynicism
nothing i need
left behind cause all i had was nothing left to lose
goodbye green
i think i'll settle for a red any day, anyways
some things were just never made to last
one day i might go back
but in the meantime, nighttime
i'll just sigh and say goodbye
save yourself and get away, got to keep myself all to my self
who knows what's waiting on the other side?
i dunno but won't we all see sometimes
take everything you've got, and give it back
keep on giving everything you're not
instead of taking everything you've got
somewhere, over the rainbow
that's what they told me, anyways
don't worry, i'll say goodbye to green
take a red any day, anyways

don't worry

don't worry i already hate you
the place that you have created doesn't have room enough for me
don't worry i can take you
i've already learned how to deal with stares, wordless comments
don't worry, i won't forget you
like the thousands before you whom i lost respect for, you will always be enshrined
no matter how hard to work, no matter how hard you try
that image of your own ignorance and utter failure is branded into my mind
perhaps it would've been best if you tried for success but sadly you have never succeeded
those hollow words that you speak are nothing but empty threats
time doesn't need to errode them to tell me that what you have said is really nothing
i don't even have to listen to you anymore
destitution and persecution is all that i am destined for by your projection
seems you have left whatever else is there to my own reflection
perhaps you hope that i can just keep afloat
never have to take care of me, carry me with your money

ergo, i too am human

long time ago eh

when i was young (long time ago eh)

i walked

i saw

big city opened up it's mouth and yawned

inviting universe ravishing in beauty and furnished with fantasy

a playground.

i walked

beside the bars, the drunks, homeless, junkies,

ne'er-do-wells. 

city life created its own offspring, larvae ready to implode

destroyed already before incubation and (re)birth

i walked

i saw

them

them

them

and i heard the words when i saw

THEM

don't be like 

them

paraded by parents (their own minds clouded by what they were taught, afraid themselves)

don't be like

THEM

don't be another drunk indian

don't be another drunk indian

DON'T BE ANOTHER DRUNK INDIAN

a long time ago eh?

sunset smiled down on the man-made metropolis

green grass growing gaily down the boulevard

human footprint on the land.

once where women took care of the land, loved it, grew only what was needed

they are gone.

only big city opening its mouth, yawns

young eyes open up to far far away

the city has disappeared already because it has destroyed itself

multiple identities gone.

no more taking children down the damp sidewalk,

telling the kids

don't be like

them

no more.

water rises up to meet the sky and everything disappears.

Parental Control

so i sit and admire the world you have created for me

the place you have designed and guarded

jealously waiting for the surprise and honour so perfect for my world

in your haste and hard work you have made it some thrill

hoping to keep me occupied and entertained

you put before me the most you could afford

the riches of your soul and all the treasures of your money galore

your foundest hopes are passed to me

the burning torch of your desires unfolds

all that you have wished for is supposedly my desires

i admire and observe these things of beauty

only to tell that you have forgotten some

or that you have not been thinking at all of me

instead you have created the world only for the image of yourself

History

and so i saw my ancestors
all lined up like at a feast
most of them all gone now to a land of rest
but the rest got told by some they're traitors

now don't tell me i've seen the last of those retaliators
cuz i know that those cowards can't mess with the best
especially when those they do are this content originators
kinda like they wanna poke some sort of jest

but time will tell who does well
overcoming the consequences of greed and destruction
passing in between the troughs and riding the swells
perhaps proving the point we've got more gumption

the song's can't be sung if the sun don't shine
but as you'll come to see, everything's done in the end of time

Kill

kill for a thrill

kill for a chill

doesn't that make you ill?

to think that a kid would even think 

that to be like that he's gotta have a shank

something you'd expect in a prison

not a seventh grader

well, why don't i catch you later?

something the matter?

why do you think i run as your teeth chatter?

doesn't it give chills

to think that your own self is ready to kill

and you claim that your in it for a thrill

spice and dice and slice

but i can see that everything ain't all rosy and nice

perhaps we can be just as nice

blame the parents

better to just eat your carrots

eye-sight will make you a better killer anyways

i've seen what you think it is to be mean

and i've seen the ways you walk and what you mean

and how you think you're all over this scene

maybe just take a step

and see the vast void over which you've leapt

from childhood to the world of men

but i bet that's really what you wanted in the end

when all you've ever learnt is how to make a good friend

but will they really be there for you in the end?

those with their flashing clothes

and the way that they talk and the way they all know

now maybe i'm sad that the shape that you're in

might have to do with the shade of your skin

but somehow i don't think it has everything to do with why you're in

honesty and modesty

are not counted as goals

where the ice in your heart is as black as coals

but maybe more along the lines of prosperity

but how you got there needs some clarity

when all the world you've seen is just a fallacy

When the Lights Go Out

they put granny on a bus to nowhere

empty seats and foreign apolstery

all the words reserved for mental health facility

don't you wanna just join in the fantasy?

but in reality, it's just granny

taking a ride with her man just cause she can

the wind from the window just making her hair blow

as she sits and thinks about why she has to go

the hospital looms ever present in her recent memory

its prison like walls surrounding her with anger and jealousy

the grandkids, forgotten like broken china dishes

all those dreams can just go swim with the fishes

they put granny on a bus to nowhere

where's she gonna go if not there?

in her place there's gonna be another

whose grandkids neglect and smother

their love so fleeting that you wonder if they ever had a mother

to teach them the ways of the world and some others

but god knows the freedom beckons

and how freedom of choice is a better reckon

maybe their parents weren't even there to reconcile

the ways in which they left them while

they spent their own time in a place out of mine

those drunks in park knocked out from wine

while somewhere in the back of their minds

they know they should be at home

caring for the baby they like to call their own

when really it's granny who's doing it alone

her worn out frame carrying all that pain

that her kids never managed to shed

no matter how much blood they saw bled

cause sometimes what you think can teach really just goes to your head

in place of that honesty

they put a fake world of hilarity

high smiles and drunken whiles are the only thing left for their disparity

money vanishing faster than a magician on speed

they work too hard to get the fix they need

the kids wrapped in granny's arms 

hoping to protect them from harm

she can't be the answer to all hate's charms

they put granny on a bus to nowhere

once upon a time youth smiled on her

the now glazed eyes of her beloved fixed with hers

he seemed so much better

but that's what life is, isn't it?

change is natural

though we like to think it's controllable

with our various drugs instead of kisses and hugs

we blind the mind instead of teaching what way to find

ain't it a crime?

they put granny on a bus to nowhere

someday, she hopes 

those undeserving little sh_ts will look back and smile

for once appreciation show in their eyes

something they didn't know the really meaning of

because they were already gone from the reach of her love

something she couldn't deal with or thought she was above

not that it's her fault

she tried the best she could for run times two

when those who weren't supposed to let her down

decided to let their responsibilities drown

and hope that all they'd get from her was a demand and a frown

but sadly their immature minds are just too blind

to know that those they hurt the most

are those they hoped they could keep close

kids aren't kids anymore

they grew up, after giving up

because there wasn't anything left for them to reach up

they put granny on a bus to nowhere

because those little sh_ts wanted her there

Magic Carpet

i've got this magic carpet,

and all you've got to do is ride it,

ride it, ride it

cuz when you think you're falling, it'll just take you higher

way up above the city skyline

the boulevards and seaside

perfect squared concrete and shops

throngs pushing through all the bus stops

loud cries and banter abound

the population continually rising

imagination searching and divining

all they can see from the sky so high

everything hide to just a plain eye

away, up high

the distractions dissipate into space

Funeral

long black rollers

crashing against the barren shoreline

the parade of the dead passes by 

mourners shrouded within their own misery

they carry the heavy burden left by the deceased

bells ring above the modern churchyard

not so long ago something much different would have occurred

the missionary priest greets the tragic party

behind they drag the wooden coffin

house of the dead

for there his spirit will reside forever in the arms of god

slowly 

the sun breaks through the morning fog and climbs

up

to its mid-day resting place above the evergreen mountains

gladly heavens rays shine down from above onto the sinners

the throng presses itself into the minute wooden church

built to hold fifty at capacity

but the fire marshall is not here to observe and demand

children talk loudly in their high-pitched voices 

many do not realize the gravity of the events before them

the choir begins to sing 

as many force themselves into the little worn building

a man attempts to open the windows

but stops when he realizes they have been painted shut

the spirit house

the mourners pass on their sadness through the ceremony

gently they lower him into the ground

his final resting place

Ghost Clouds

they smile like a dead dream
a dead dream half empty, the moldy lace curtains shaking in the whistling wind
nothing more shall remain
golden sunlight gone down behind the horizon
flowers bend in the oncoming storm
big brown earth mouth opens wide
yawns
swallows up the water from the wide open sky
nothing left behind
all is emptiness
ghost clouds smear in pirouettes daintily
their shadows dance on the grass
fading soon, they too will be gone
serene grandmother smiles
little children look up at the big dark sky
thunder?
lightening?
just words to express physical action
just names to express physical emotion
just another form of attachment
time changes all of everything
infinity keeps walking on
one by one, they are all gone
rain comes again
the wide earth opens wide mouths and swallows
rain falls down from the sky
grey aggregate colour
it lookings longingly at the ground so far away
the granite in the ground is the same colour
waving in the wind the grass continues
so many more times grass will be there
long ago descendants of it saw the same
everything is changed by time
only infinity keeps walking on

Gone

magic doesn't happen overnight
doesn't get created when you sit up late at night
no-one understands why you'd go destroy something right
cuz magic's just another way to determine the wrong from the right

creation is just another evolution
when what you really want is revolution
crucify the masses and force them to wallow in their own retribution
no more lies and games, just a final solution

tolerance doesn't really teach
all it does is keep killin those who preach
the message screwed up before it gets to those they're tryna reach
nothing to lessen the fact that all they've ever taught they sucked off like a leech

motion flows and thought pattern slows
what's been done and gone is only in between the lows
keep you eyes up on the sky don't look down below
watchers keepin their eyes on you from down low

honesty the best defence for those who hope to repent
something to show for how many lives they spent
the last mistake, one to many for those who's lives went
angry edge to the horizon makes the land look bent

never seen anything so obviously destructive
curling tentacles menacing through eyes and hearts receptive
young minds gone to something so bad and deceptive
but what can we do, when they have chosen their own demise as elective?

bury the dead and move on
cuz what's been said is broken and gone
face the darkness and hope to usher in the dawn
but what can you do when everyone else is gone?

don't ride the fence and hope we'll buy your blue sky blues
cuz what you really wanna hide will come back to you
especially when you're knowin that it's really all true
feelings and farces can't save you from the fate painted by black and blue

they promised you the world in exchange for all you can give
but don't you want a chance to just be here and live?
or is that too much to ask for from someone slipping through a sieve

perhaps it's that you don't want to be here
instead you want to go where everything is really clear
and get yourself out of here
but what'll happen to those you left behind and helpless?

buy yourself that one way ticket
cuz once you've got it you can never release it
take yourself to a cell or a little black box, cuz that's what you want isn't?
and maybe then you know that you can't really get it

you don't really know what you got til it's gone and no i'm not just talking about that one song
you know the one where you kinda sang along
well it's that same old song
except that you never saw the light and now that time has gone

Not So Innocent

Clustering the corner
leaning, apprehensive
the crowd admires the passing traffic.
Rain patters down, unnoticed
they are worlds away,
heads spun and twisted, the needles within knitting.
Glassy eyes stare back at passerby
ignoring
everything that they don't want to see.
Recognizing only the ones they know
looking beyond everything and everyone else
always searching.
Tourist exits bus
glancing in their general direction,
is afraid of them.
Fear takes over,
takes the role of fight or flight
the heart begins to pump harder.
At first they do not notice the tourist,
sitting duck,
hoping they will remain unobservant.
Unfortunately, some are more aware than others
one shambles over
glassy eyes hidden by a playful smile.
Tourist recoils
who are they
why are they here.
Caught off guard by the innocent smile
that is not so innocent
all is not what they thought.

Sing Your Own Song

what's be done is only what's become
the things from which we thought we'd run
cuz that's the only way we can see what's begun
and in the end where we've come from

if anything we should hope to understand
instead of look around and only reprimand
cuz that's the way we shouldn't really stand
without the honesty or truth of what we set to plan

if we had the time or morality
we'd be able to create what we want in reality
rather than drive our own desires into obscurity
because we're so caught up with popularity

magic doesn't happen overnight
without the thought of flight
with the the awesome sight
of how we'll make a "maybe" might

and even with this consideration
all we may have left is truly trepidation
cuz we're just full and often are mistaken
but how would you know without that revelation

to ask isn't to find
it's to look at what you've done and redesign
stepping outside in what you've come to mind
until you can look back and maybe see a sign

the image of perfection is something best left to reflection
rather than instant satisfaction
cuz you know it won't end with all that gratification
rather you'll see that you were overtaken

thoughts destroy and recreate
the things we swore we'd really hate
but how can you full comprehend the matters of late
when some foolish fallacy is given such a weight

flowers don't bloom in dead empty soil
and work won't get done without any toil
even so you need to see between the vinegar and oil
and reach right back down into that dark black soil

recite not what you were taught but your own song
cuz in the space of absence we have stood too long
hoping that some presence will hurry us along
but that isn't true; sing your own song

Big Blue Lake

big blue lake
kinda like the one we call crystal lake
sparkling starts dancing on the water
and all you can see is the big blue crystal off as far
as
you can see
wish somebody could be here
to share
the way things are looking
something special should be shared
not locked away in a vault of memory
sadness doesn't turn to goodness
not matter how much you apply the kindness
spring comes late here
hardy trees punctuate the rugged rocks
determined
they pine onward
no pun intended
one day i want to build a cabin on these big crystal shores
logs of cut pine
sweet smells of sap to wake up to
nothing better in the world
away from the traffic and the throngs
and all the things that can possibly go wrong
dancing sky
i can see for miles
the water beckons
for
a canoe to crest the surface
long ago memories come back
some things you just can't forget
no matter
how you crush them

the foundation's been laid
lumber delivered
sun shines down on the fresh cement
the old house is long gone
nothing will remain
it took a while to get rid of all the junk
maybe next week we will get the frame up
right now we can just wait
from here you can just see the road
not too busy though
soon the kids will have their own rooms
something to be said for a good sized house
maybe in two weeks
we can start the roof
lumber lies where the shed once stood
we will put another one up
one without mold
and garbage
you couldn't open the door
or garbage would tumble out

Feeling

what a magical mystery
of the things that begin and the things we rekindle
something to be said for the things we find alternatively
relationships fade and the weather does change
time goes by and the wind sighs
how we face the world realistically
the choice is yours
magic doesn't happen overnight
you have to work at it
Rome wasn't built in a day
or so they like to say
slowly our fears can edge away
and leave us with nothing but what we really want
something we can choose to mold and fold
the feelings and things we want to share instead of burdens to bear

Time and Time Again

rain clouds and electric razors shine reflections off the bathroom window
sunshine creeping through the clouds again and blue sky's on the way
somewhere a bus rumbles through the buildings
grass getting illuminated by the sharp shining light
traffic wines as the clock ticks the day by in seconds
on the desk the papers sit for me, ever-ready
waiting for that knock on the door and the eviction notice
sitting still no sound comes from the stairwell
everything's packed, set to be sent up north
back home somebody's waiting
counting down the days until the time is here
no more knocks on the door at ungodly hours of the day
while the time away
bare walls stare out with uninspired faces
all the photos of cousins and countless others are gone
sandwiched between books and breakables within boxes
duck tape keeps them all safe
sunshine day
clutter cleared and counters cleaned, gleaming
nothing remains, all will disappear
open windows sing to the wind, come in come in come in
time and time again
one orange moving truck idles below
boxes, bags and parcels make the descent to its bed
there they will remain until the destination
one last careful check to insure everything is gone
saying goodbye
returning the key one last time
the landlord isn't home, he won't know until it's too late
a stop at the bank to gather the well-saved money
soon, the on-ramp to the highway
no turning back

This Land

dark dank rain on the truck windshield,
onward i go.
clouds descend with ever-rising rapidity,
i laugh, and think of the times when these skyies were sunny.
west coast wet coast.
nothing between me and the empty highway except how many tonnes of metal they put in this truck,
cruising along between the evergreen gorges, the sparkling streams and the ferocious waterfalls.
up ahead, just another in turn in the road,
onward i go.
mist sits in the trees, looking down thoughtfully as i admire the its wispy mustache whinging its way between the boughs.
"just guy, on the lost highway"
cold night will set in before and after i have reached my final destination.
city born, country bred.
i dog the relentless reaches of the province,
and pound the pulverized pavement that winds its way wonderously throughout.
soon
i will load my behemoth vehicle of steel, iron and whatever else they are putting in these damn automobiles nowadays,
onto the wrought platform of a ferry
and coast merrily down the coast, past the reserves and resources
the dark evergreens everywhere.
so long i have longed for this land,
the mountains that open up their arms to pick me up and carry me into their hearts,
the currents in the ocean that twirl and wave their hands, beckoning,
the world where everything began for me.
the place where i have grown up.
there is no other place like it it the world.
though my ancestors come from lands to the east, the Metis in Manitoba and Saskatchewan and others farther still,
forever i will be here in this land.
this is where i come from.
i have been taught the ways of this land,
when i set foot in it i am able to understand.